A pair of football trainers, 1 coloured pencil, 2 table tennis bats, 1 miniature table tennis table, a postcard depicting 5 happy pigs, 1 Roald Dahl book – Danny The Champion of the World, 1 Top Gear book, 1 LEGO Ninjago sword, 1 stuffed bear, 1 cardboard tube, 3 Moshi Monster trading cards, 1 ruler.

Out of everything it’s the Roald Dahl book that I am most annoyed about.  The shame.  Why couldn’t she have eaten those hideously boring rainbow fairy chapter books?

Periodically during the performance the man next to your mother climbs over several partially empty seats in front of us, scuttles along a row and leaves the hall only to return again a few minutes later. When he is not seat hurdling he quietly hums and softly whistles along with Jack. He either has a severe continence problem and/or he is one or maybe two notes short of an octave. At first he is an amusing diversion.

As the second half of the show starts there is a strange rustling noise from our bizarre neighbour. “What’s he doing now?” asks your mother out of the side of her mouth. I lean forward and peer through the gloom, lean back and whisper out the side of my mouth “He’s got his piece out”. The seats creak and squeak as the audience within earshot of my stage whisper shift uneasily, the way sheep react when they notice a dog peering with intent through a five bar gate.

“CHANGE SEATS WITH ME, NOW!” demands your mother now rigid with fear. We change seats and I sit next to the oddball as he noisily munches a ham sandwich … or if you are a recent immigrant from Scotland a ham piece.

It was the local Minister, who must have been hunched over his mobile in the pulpit of the church “Your laptop has gone to sleep, I need the password”. In a split second the blood drained from my face and my palms became clammy as I realised that I was going to have to share my password.

The minister was, stood in-front of a big screen, in church, with 100 or so local ministers seated in-front of him, attempting a Skype call with India. The Husband had set up the whole thing and to make things easier had used my netbook.

I could sense the urgency in his whispers as he asked me to tell him. I stalled, as I ummed my way through a list of possibles, in my head, all containing words that I would never wish to say on a Saturday afternoon, into my phone in the butchers … let alone to the local minister.

Suddenly a wave of calm came over me and I told him the password and we ended our call. As I put my phone away I thanked the God of Gin, who is the only god I pray to with any consistency, that I had changed my password from ’3IGHA1RYARSES’ last week, to something sensible, when the children started logging on regularly to do their homework.

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I love travelling with the kids.  Now they are out of nappies, don’t need pushchairs or travel cots traveling is much easier.

Regardless of where we’re going I’ve always made sure I’m prepared for, pretty much, every eventuality. I always pack a bag with cards, pens, books and games that we can whip out at any opportunity to keep the children occupied.  I usually don’t reveal what’s in the bag so that everything is a bit of a surprise.

Netflights have a nifty family summer holidays puzzle pack, which is a downloadable booklet to keep children occupied while travelling.  It has word searches, dot-to-dots, colouring sheets and things to spot.  I’ll be printing this off next time we travel abroad, I think it’ll be perfect for the next time we fly … and I’ll get a little bit of peace and quiet.

The Teenager always sighs, fairly dramatically, when she knows it’s a ‘Work Weekend’. She knows that there’ll be no socialising and no visitors. I’ll be glued to my laptop, probably in my pyjamas and it’s down to The Husband to do all the ferrying to and fro and keeping the children amused. This weekend is slightly different, as it’s a bank holiday, so I’ll be working Monday too (though only 9am-5pm).

So today, with the loooong bank holiday looming, I’ve just opened the door to a delivery driver.  The box he handed me contained a Bank Holiday fun pack from Fairy.  As P&G are proud sponsors of the London 2012 Olympic Game Fairy have sent us two of the 26 sports featured at the Olympic Games … so they want us to get practising at home with a table tennis set, basketball with hoop and a plate painting kit.

Yes, I know that plate painting is not an Olympic sport but … Fairy is running a campaign called Dishes of Best Wishes, asking the nation to get behind their favourite team or athlete by designing a best wishes message on a plate via a fun App on www.facebook/fairydish.  Fairy are aiming for 20,000 messages of support to spur them on.

So, thank you Fairy and P&G for our Bank Holiday Kit … I reckon the least we can do is log on and get designing!

It’s the last day of the competition for our family to win a Nissan LEAF.  We had a lot of fun test driving the car, it was perfect for our family lifestyle, and our first charge of 111 miles lasted 6 days. We managed to get a combination of dogs, wellies, scooters and bikes in the boot to suit all.

The Teenager, who will be learning to drive in just over two months, was particularly impressed with the bluetooth capabilities and though nothing of fiddling away playing HER music and ringing people.  The 7 year old’s favourite feature were the two cup holders in the back … she’s easily pleased.  The silence of the car was not golden at times, particularly when driving along the back alley and pensioners not realising we were there. The back seat had more room than our current estate car and the three children sat together with more leg room and bottom space!

We had the car for two weeks and it wasn’t unusual for me to nip out to the shops and be gone longer than normal due to the interest in the car.  The locals were all voting and at a party on Saturday three people I’d never met before came up and told me they’d been voting and loved our video.

A change in the rules, mid competition, meant that I could no longer offer test drives to those who wanted them but if you do still want to test drive the Nissan LEAF you can do so by booking one here

I am very grateful to our friends the length and breadth of the UK, India, America, Australia and Slovakia … and anyone else I’ve forgotten for voting and making it their daily duty to turn me on.  The Husband’s business partners, Dev and Avi, have invited us to go and stay with them In India during a trip we’re planning next year.

When Nissan LEAF Car 28 had to go back we were all a little sad, the children congregated on the front step to wave the car off. I explained to the nice Nissan man about the custard stain on the passenger seat from this and the abundance of brown dog hair on the driver seat from this and we agreed that we’d put the car through very rigorous tests. Due to technical hitches we were unable to get the in-car camera working.  Also the free Carwings app which lets you set the climate control, via iphone, from the comfort of your bed before you set off for work … and check your range didn’t get going but I can imagine it’s a real bonus.

Tonight at midnight the competition ends, the votes will all be verified and hashtags (like the one I’ve bombarded everyone with on Twitter for our car #NissanLEAFcar28) counted up by an independent adjudicator.  We’d love to win, but even if we don’t we had a blast and will always think fondly of the time we spent with Larry the Nissan LEAF and the day the production team came to our house to film us for our special family road trip. The laughter on that day was well worth it. Please vote here;

Later, as I went up to bed I looked in on them as I always do. I forgot the bickering that had gone on and how many times I had to repeat myself. I forgot that the 6 year old left every pencil and felt tip strewn across the living room floor and that the 7 year old left the fridge door open for god knows how long.  I forgot that they argued about who would sit in the front of the car and who would eat the last apple.

In that moment, fast asleep … they were the most perfect things I ever did see.

(*) – If you think that’s weird imagine my surprise when they came home with a giant smiling stuffed beaver.