I received the following email, whilst camping;
Dear Laura
Do you have access to a computer daily, would you like to work online and get paid weekly?
I am currently seeking a personal assistant. I would have loved to meet up with you to talk about this job but I am currently away on an assignment. There will be no interview. I will prepay you in advance to handle mail and some shipping.
When you get my packages you are required to mail them to where I want them mailed to. You don’t have to put money out of your pocket, all you have to do is have packages shipped to your house.
All expenses and taxes will be covered by me. You will work between 15 and 20 hours a month. I will pay £180 for every assignment, and you will have between 6-8 assignment monthly.
Best Regards
Craig
Dear Craig
Thank you for your generous offer of employment. A job with no interview? To be paid over £1000 a month for sitting on my ever increasing arse to receive and post your ‘packages’. It sounds like ebay but without the tedious act of ‘listing’.
It is with regret that I have to decline your offer of employment. For starters I have a job, a perfectly legal one. Secondly, and most importantly, Craig, I do not wish to mail Class A drugs around Great Britain.
I bid you farewell and wish you no success in your future ventures.
Kind regards
Laura
PS My postman has enough trouble getting letters to our house. Can you imagine what he’d think of your ‘packages’?
10 Comments on "A Generous Offer of Employment …"
I love your ‘Kind regards’, I do!
Poor Craig
Out on assignments – probably as a spy or a detective, waiting for his packages – all he wants is someone to forward them on and you accuse him of being a drug dealer. He is probably in therapy now, on sick leave from his important assignment.
And your postman probably put him up to it…
Could you let me have Craig’s e-mail address please?
What? No ‘Dear Twat’ letter? The shame.
See, you people always assume the worst. I’m sure Mr. Craig is just a busy man, making movies about girls with dragoon taboos or whatever, and just needs you to forward his fan mail from his publicist to him, that way, his people have “plausible deniability’ of his whereabouts.
Or it’s “the drugs” as the hemp cats call it.
Have you been giving you email address out on dodgy websites?
I never get any of these interesting (conman type) emails, though we did once get a phone call asking if we’d forgotten about the bank account we had with £350,000 in it in South America?? Of course they would need our UK bank details to transfer the money…….
Omg – do they not know that they cannot get away with these kinda things!!
You do realise though somewhere that some poor sap is doing this and hadn’t even thought that it was drug smuggling.
BNM
I have just been having a grand catch-up of your doings. Still wiping tears of mirth from my eyes over your proposed text to Sandy!
For Batman: I am not positive it works on rats, but steel wool shoved in a hole will keep mice out. Just in case…
How come you got offered more than me?! So unfair. Hurumph.
LMFAO, too hard to type, you are so polite.